When shops were shops

Do you remember when shops were defined by what they sold?  Did you go to the ‘paper shop’ as a kid?  I know I did.  Every Sunday with my big sister to get a newspaper for Dad and some sweets from the penny mix, if we were lucky.   Then there was the baker’s, the butcher’s, the chemist, the florist, greengrocer.  I often long for this simple existence that I know still exists in many parts of the country.  I wonder how many young people around here though realise what it was like, not that long ago.  Do they realise how commercial their lives have become?

Did we actively make the choice that we wanted shopping to become a hobby or is it because we no longer go to church?  Or because we no longer have manual jobs so we are no longer shattered at the weekend?  Or because we no longer live near family, or close communities so there is no one to visit.  Is it because we are sold all this stuff by clever marketers and believe it all?  Or is it simply because they are open?  I have previously questioned my own desires being manipulated by lovely shopping displays, but I am also wondering what sort of weekend pursuits my little one is exposed to.  He has been able to recognise a certain coffee shop logo from a very young age.  He is certainly familiar with a weekend afternoon trip for a hot chocolate and is also familiar with the layout of several large shops near us.  He doesn’t question me going shopping on a Saturday night or as a family on a Sunday.

I think it may be time to make sure that shopping doesn’t become a default activity for us.  Remember when shopping was something you did because you needed something?  

I think I might be turning into a hippy....are there any communist countries left I can join?!?!

Bathtime fitness

In my determination to fit more into my day, I decided to use the time that the little one is in the bath to do some stretching.  Now, our bathroom is not big and I only have an 'L' shape to work with.  This does mean I have to have a certain level of flexibility and my legs are wedged between the bath and the loo when I sit down.  Standing stretches are also a bit tricky due to the number of cabinets, door handles, sink, etc.  However, I do have plenty of places to rest my book of stretching and I can at least follow most stretches for my shoulders and back.

So far it is working out just fine and the little one is actually quite encouraging.  The only downside is that bathtimes are now just calmer.  I stretch, we chat, he plays calmly.  This sounds good, I hear you say.  This is true, but I do miss the more raucous, splashy fun bathtimes. 

Do you have any other suggestions of how I can fit in more fitness?  Aside of course from heavy lifting (little one) and running up the stairs?

A confession: I love my carpet sweeper

I know I sound like a housewife from the 1890’s, but I love it.  I inherited our current vacuum when I moved in with Husband and it is a man-sized, cumbersome beast.  It was invented by a man (you know the one), for men who don’t know what to look for when buying a vacuum.  Husband refuses to replace his vacuum, so I refuse to clean the floors with it.  This has worked just fine in the past when we had mainly hard-flooring, but in this house, it is a problem.   Not content to be stuck with one pass of the vacuum a week (when Husband is free at the weekend), I use my humble carpet sweeper once a day instead.  

I love it because it is so light for carrying upstairs and it’s a bonus that it doesn’t use electricity.  That means I don’t need to find a handy plug, be careful with the wire, warn the little one about the noise or pay to use it.  No fancy attachments or instructions means it is also easy to use and easy to empty.  

It is sad that so often automated products are seen as best.  We have been sold the idea that the vacuum is the only answer and now they are supposed to wash as well.  And for a small spill, it has to be a handheld power vacuum rather than a dustpan and brush!*

So, next time you are perusing the ‘laminated book of dreams’, do give the carpet sweepers a glance, you might be surprised how cheap and wonderful they are.

* Notes:

·         Of course, vacuums are great and should be used to get rid of dust.  For crumbs and general sock fluff issues, though, a carpet sweeper rules.

·         Dishwashers are of course fantastic and the only way to deal with the washing up... I miss mine...*sob*. 

Monday compartment

Last week ended in some chaos and after a calm weekend away, I was determind to start the new week well.  Today was a good example of how my new idea of compartmentalising works when I put it into practice.

I managed to keep a calm toddler, cook a meal that will last more than one day (and some for the freezer!) and get some housework done.

It has meant that I have had to forego time on my laptop and ignore it calling out to me all day.  What I feel tonight though is a great satisfaction that I was a good parent today and that is, after all, my primary job.  I did also manage to have time to do some of my own stuff as well as a little time for some mind-numbing telly too.

A Mother's Work Meme

Still getting used to all this stuff, but going to have a go at this anyway as it is a cause I believe in.....

A Mother’s Work Meme
Rules:
Please post the rules
Answer the questions in as much or as little detail as suits you
Leave a comment on mother.wife.me so we can keep track of the meme
Tag 3 people and link to them on your blog (gonna ignore this bit, as not sure I know 3 to tag, or how!)
Let them know you tagged them
Tweet loudly about taking part (well ok, that isn’t a rule, but how about if we start a hashtag – #amothersworkmeme)

Questions:
1.  Did you work before becoming a mum?
Yes, I did.  However, I took a step down before getting pregnant as I took a brave move to relocate to be with my now husband, with the hope that marriage and children would follow.  When I got pregnant I was contracting, so maternity leave was not something I had to deal with. 

2.  What is your current situation?
I am at home with my toddler at the moment.  I spent the first two years with him and then last year I went back to work while husband became a SAHD.  We have swapped again and now I am looking to do some work that will fit around bringing up the little one.  We both want one of us there for him over the next few years and working around school hours was not something we thought of when planning a career! Money is not easy though and nor is being at home doing the housework.

3.  Freestyle – got your own point you’d like to get across on this issue? Here’s your chance…
Rant 1: So Too much of being a SAHM is about housework, which is tedious - especially without a dishwasher! I would be happy to stay at home and do mummy things, if I could have a maid to do all the food planning, shopping, cleaning and cooking.  I often feel like SAHM is actually a misnomer as the 'Mum' part is just a part, and some days not a big one, of what you have to do as the parent at home.  I prefer 'Director of Home Affairs'....just wish the salary matched the title.

Rant 2: Society seems to have changed so much that there are so few SAHPs ('Parents' so as not to disrespect my dear husband) around these days.  So, actually, being in an office provides adult conversation, a chance to complain about kids, childcare, sleepless nights, etc. in a way that being at home doesn't. 

Rant 3: When did parenting your child/ren become a luxury?  We struggle on one income so we can steer, educate and give our child some manners and morals that we believe in.  I think kids should be kids for a while when they are young and institutions are for when they're older. 

Rant 4: I wish that flexible working opportunities were better, but understand why.  I wish that kids were taught more about being parents at school in relation to careers so I didn't get to this age and feel a bit miffed that no one thought to point all this out.

No time to daydream

All this 'doing more' means I have found myself using any small amount of time to do something productive.  Whether it's my usual bedtime reading or waiting for food to cook or brushing my teeth, every moment is now accounted for.  Trouble is I am missing having a good daydream. 

So, today's plan is to fit in some time to get my thoughts in order by letting them drift in all directions.  The waiting room for an appointment this afternoon with our beloved, but much waited for, NHS should provide ample opportunity.

Aisles of desire

In many ways I am fortunate.  I live very close to some very nice department stores.  One in particular is very easy to park near, has great toilets for both me and the little one, has good lifts for the pushchair........and is full of beautiful things. 

The only thing is, every time I walk through it I am filled with the desire for a bigger, better home with a bigger, better bathroom for bales of bouncy towels, for a study with empty bookcases to fill with gorgeous stationery items, for a huge dining room to store several sets of matching crockery, for a living room the size of a mainline station to accommodate the enormous clock that I am currently coveting and six sofas so I can fill them all with exquisite cushions.  The store designers are to be congratulated as they are truly experts in their field.  I feel inadequate in my home furnishings and that I have somehow failed in life that I do not have the perfect home to put all these perfect things in. 

So, I have decided to avoid the temptress of dreams.  Buddhists believe that desire that can never be satisfied can only bring suffering.  I shall park elsewhere, pee elsewhere and hopefully feel happier and more content with my home as a result.